Family Stuff, Old Creep-Os, and People Who Aren't So Awful

Had the option to work today to cover someone on vacation at the library, but I needed a day to make various phone calls, catch up the checkbook and pay bills.  Last week I worked Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Saturday. (Saturday was a regularly scheduled workday.)  Plus it's my dad's birthday today, and I needed to make sure his present worked (with many AA batteries! I will give you a hint: it's on this page) before I bring it to dinner tonight. 

He requested dinner out at this little bar/restaurant down the street from my parents' --it's, um, an interesting place.  My 86yo neighbor lady likes to go there for drinks so already that tells me something.  And we had a strange experience there the weekend after Thanksgiving which somehow I managed to block out (it was a bad few days involving YS in the hospital and my aunt's Welcome to the Spinster Club phone call) but it involved the servers' pronunciation of "gnocchi" as "ganache"--which is a crime against two Romance languages--and some awful singing that might or might not have been karaoke.

So I likely will have another story about that place after tonight.

I'm sure you're all waiting for an update in the Online Dating department of my life.

The good news is, I found the setting where I can hide my profile from members older than 15 years my senior and I turned that on.

The bad news is, it's 15 years which means I'm still getting hits from people above the age I would consider dating someone. But it helps cut down on the parade of creep-os looking at my profile and sending me wordless emoji messages.  (BTW, still dealing with creep-os IRL as there was one at the feast mass I cantored two weekends ago.)  And I'm still getting weird messages from people in my age range.

Like the 46yo from the Midwest who I can tell read only as far as my intro and my "what I'm seeking in a mate" (i.e., the first two sections you see on anyone's profile) and messaged me a line-by-line response to my "what I'm seeking" section.  And used the word "HAWT."

Is that a thing anymore?  Maybe in the Midwest.  But not if you're over 40.

I even was messaged by someone five years younger who said hi to me pretty much because I was close by and new and decent looking.  However, he answered "No" to two of the questions about two very serious core beliefs of our faith: "I agree with the Church's teachings about contraception" and "I agree with the Church's teachings about premarital sex."

Hmmmm. I wonder what he's looking for.

Seriously, this is a site for Catholics who (I hope) are looking for long term relationships that lead to marriage.  If someone's looking for a shag, there are so many other sites and apps to go on.  I wonder if when someone clicks "No" to the faith questions the site asks,

While we're on a closely related subject, this week is NFP Awareness Week.  It's not just for married couples as it can benefit single women, too.  My testimonial is coming up this week over at Under Thy Roof as Kirby has asked single women to talk about their experience. I'm looking forward to hearing other women's stories.

My GYN's office called today to follow up to see if I wanted to schedule a procedure to deal with my fibroids and I said I'm going to wait.  I don't really have a clear idea of what the future holds and I know I'm starting to get too old to hope to be a mom (biologically), but I just want to try seeing if dropping a few pounds helps first.  I haven't lost a ton of weight yet but I ventured out in a swimsuit on Friday with a friend who needed company while she took her 6yo son and his friend to the pool--and nobody shielded their eyes except possibly to mitigate my blinding paleness, so I guess I don't offend.

And, to round out my update in the Online Dating department, I'm messaging with a couple of members.  One is about three years older, lives about an hour and a half or so away.  Generally nice but really the only thing that excites me so far is his extensive music collection.

The other is about two years older, works in technology, I almost didn't respond because (shallow me) his profile picture is from a rather unflattering angle, but I went through the rest of the photos--which are recent!--and they're cuter.  And we both think Fulton Sheen is awesome.  Of course, he lives like a 7-hour drive south of here. . . but he mentioned in his profile that he's a transplant from NY and stated at least twice that he's willing to go anywhere to meet the love of his life.

So if anyone has any advice about online dating, long-distance dating (not that I'm getting ahead of myself!), or the like, I welcome it in the comments.  Along with anything else that's on your mind.

Now I'm off to heat up my lunch which is the last of my Hawaiian porkchops.  Yum.



Rae said…
Hi Kate,

I have been praying for you the last few months but haven't had time to comment. I saw your bio in Kirby's quick takes introduction post and thought it was you! So cool.
My DH and I met in person but were long distant for nine months after three months of dating. In my experience, having a ending point for the long distance was the most helpful. We knew my graduation and job search meant either a move towards reunification and likely marriage or breakup.
Kate P said…
Rae--Hello!!! It's so nice to hear from you. Thanks so much for the prayers. Yup, I'm gonna be blabbing about Creighton, hee hee.
I appreciate the perspective on long distance. My first LTR (of a whopping six months) was in college and I'm pretty sure the distance played a part in the breakup, but so did his immaturity, so I just have no real "adult" experience in this sort of thing. Should it occur. So, um, yeah, please keep praying.
ccr in MA said…
I'm glad to get your updates! As you know from *my* blog, I have no helpful advice for you with the dating thing (especially online), but I am rooting for good things for you.

And that recipe looks delicious! I need to start a shopping list.
Kate P said…
CCR--I am totally down for good things, thank you :) And guess what--guy #1 just revealed he has a CAT. Like, how could he hold out on me like that? This is a big deal!
ccr in MA said…
He has a secret cat? Is it in witness protection or something? That's a key factor in relationships, it should be on page one!
Kate P said…
I know, CCR! A 17yo kitty! He said his well-meaning guy friends told him not to talk about cats in his profile. Are you kidding? If a guy expresses love for animals (and nieces and nephews are good too), most women would go, "Awwwww!" And along the lines of what you said, I told him, if you aren't being your real self, how will you attract the right person??? (Good thing I can attract cat guys, I guess!)

ccr in MA said…
Ooh, phone call! Updates when you have them, please!

I always felt very strongly about being yourself for just that reason. Like, if I go to a bar to try to meet guys, won't I find guys who like going to bars? And not that there's anything wrong with bars, but if I don't want to hang out in them, why would I want to meet someone who does?

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