Somewhat of an Appreciative Maiden Moment

This afternoon, I met up with a couple of former co-workers (from the job I quit to student teach, although they both had been let go post-merger before then) to go see The Unknown. (My impression: It was O.K. but seemed at times to be ripping off Vanilla Sky--ugh--and The Manchurian Candidate, if that's possible to do in the same movie. It was based on a novel that I'm fairly certain was written in another country.) Afterwards, we had dinner at a local diner and had our girl talk. We promised to do our movie/dinner thing again soon, and then we parted ways.

By some bizarre cosmic timing, I had to go pick up a book from the bookstore--I made the reservation for the one near the movies--went upstairs to nose around the YA books, helped a dad and his daughter looking for the Warriors series (yes, I introduced myself as a librarian so I wasn't some nosy stranger)--and then as I'm coming down the escalator to go to the register to get the book, The Ex walks by downstairs. And of course looks up--then keeps walking (thankfully). There's probably very little chance he didn't recognize me, even though I had my hair straightened and my "church makeup" on.

I don't know where his wife was, but. . . weird. I still don't want to be in the same room with him (and I noticed his car was heading out of the parking lot as I was just walking out of the store), but it's more like just a huge, huge relief that I don't have to put up with him and his hang-ups for the rest of my life. I know there's better.

Am I sad I don't have that "better" in my life right now? Am I frustrated that for whatever reason I don't know where "better" is? Sure, but I think there's still a tiny part of me that needed to grow up. Still some things I need to experience, some things I need to do to get myself in order. Like all the lovely apartment-cleaning I'm doing this weekend. I'm getting there.

But jeez, out of all the bookstores in the area and all the times of day--what are the freaking odds?


Pammy pam said…
Screw him. Aooreciate yourself and your sanity.
Kate P said…
It's funny, Pam--my mom said, "Maybe God likes to remind him of what he missed out on, every once in a while."
ccr in MA said…
It's totally weird that you would just run into him like that ... but how wonderful that seeing him makes you feel relieved not to be with him! Ships that pass, no awkward confrontation, sounds good to me!
Kate P said…
CCR--my heart was pounding for a bit, I'll admit. But no, he'd never come within a foot of me voluntarily, so there'd never be a confrontation of any kind.

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